We Are Family.

Divorce and then remarriage can be a hard thing.  I have never been through it or known anyone close who has been through it but learning about it makes me ache for the people who do go through it.  When this happens there is a lot to take in.  You are now combining two new lives together again and then there may be kids involved as well.  Even though it is hard it is possible.  Parents will need to learn of the new roles with raising the kids if kids are brought in.  It is being married again but people may be more aware of things.  It is possible and the new families can be happy together just as before.  Families are forever and our Father in heaven wouldn't want us living a life we don't like but we should always try to make things work out and have divorce be a last option.  It is hard work but it can be done.
~m

Angels We Have Heard On High.

It's such a blessing to know that we have people of a higher power watching over us.  We are not alone on this earth, we all have guardian angels protecting us.  Sometimes things just happen and you have no way of explaining it.  It's also good to realize that is you are having a problem you can't handle, there is someone to watch over and help you.  With family problems a lot of people, including myself, turn to the Lord.  The Lord has such great power that we could not comprehend.  When life is getting bad you sometimes have to put your trust in the Lord and know that what will happen will happen.  We also need to be always listening to the Spirit.  With trying to raise a child you may not know what to do but I know if you pray and ask for that help then you will be able to receive it.  We will always be taken care of.
~m

Mother I love you, Mother I do.

Being raised by my mother has been so important to me.  My Dad was there too but my mom was a stay at home mom growing up.  I remember her being there until about junior high and I remember how that affected me too.  Not having my mom their when I got home from school was weird because she wasn't there to ask me how my day ways.  I would go over to my friends house and sit with her until my mom got home so that I could talk to her.  It wasn't a horrible thing but those couple of years I missed it.
For me I know it is important to be there for my children.  If I don't teach my children then someone else will and it may be stuff that I don't agree with.  Sometimes you do need the extra help but it is important for children to have their parents.
Another example is when my oldest sister was born she was watched by my Aunt while my mom and dad worked.  Well one day my sister called my Aunt Mom and my mom said nope and that was the end of that.  She quit her job and then raised four children.
I love my parents and for always being there for me.  I am really close to them and the older we are all getting as siblings and parents we are able to become more like friends and not just a parent/child relationship.  Again I know that is because they were around while growing up, and still now, in everything we do.
~m

This is real, this is me.

Oh my I feel like I am on cloud nine right now!  But not from being in love with a man but for being in love with my major.  My Family relations class is truly amazing.  It is so cool to be having a hard time with something or understanding something in life, but don't worry this class helps me to figure it out.  Today we talked about how to counsel with others and that everyone needs to be involved in it not just you or whoever is head making the decisions.  Here at BYU-Idaho I am the Relief Society of my ward.  I would kind of take charge or also not know what to do.  Today though I opened my minds more of that the other girls can help just as much as I could, they can receive revelation to help as well.
Being able to counsel can help in families just as much.  If there is big major issues you can sit down as a family and together hear everyone's thoughts and what they think.  It is good to have that bond of making choices together as a family and not have one person, this can be important to have a family unified and have peace.  We should have a special time and place to hold these meetings. Start with talking about how much you appreciate that person and what they do.  A pray is always good to have as well so that the Lord's presence can be there to make the best outcome for your family.  Talk about what is going on and try to come to a conclusion and then make sure to thank the Lord afterwards to help you.  Bring a little bit a chocolate for afterwards so that you can talk afterwards and enjoy some chocolate together.
Learning all of this makes me excited to help better my family in the future and also the one I have now even though I don't live with them at home anymore.  I can't wait to keep learning and so that I can hopefully help people in their lives as well.
~m

Bad things happen to good people.

I have this neighbor who just passed away from a stroke and then being in a coma for a couple of days.  It was/is hard, she left behind a husband who is a new bishop and five young kids.  This family has been through so much.  One son had cancer and another son got stepped on by a horse and now this.  When this happened the question of 'why' was running through every bodies head.  Now I know God has a plan for everyone but sometimes it just gets hard.  We talked about why bad things happen to good people the other day in class and the stress it causes.  With all of this happening they are still able to remain strong and have good faith and carry on even though it is something extremely sad and hard.  Looking back and thinking on it now you can turn to see these in the light of blessings.  The son who had cancer, was healed and has been cancer free for a couple of years, the son whose head was stepped on a horse survived and is just fine now with no side affects.  As for the mother, if she was to come out of a coma and survive she could of easily had brain damage which could of been hard on the family.  Sometimes it is hard to see the bright side in a stressful situation but it depends on how you look at it and to always remember that God has a plan and in the end it will be the best for us.
~m

Going Courtin'.

Marriage is such a big step in life and it should be taken that way, in steps.  First comes the dating, then comes the courtship, then the engagement then the wedding.  When thinking of dating you should be dating around, dipping your toe in the water.  When you find someone with someone who you could see marrying then you take it to the courtship.  In a courtship though, it should be for marriage, that is President Hinkley told us.  The engagement is a very important step to come next.  You are taking that step saying, "I want to commit to you" which is huge.  Try to make the engagement a good one though, it will give you something to look back on when times are hard.  During this don't just plan for the wedding day but plan for marriage.  You are combined two lives together and that will bring changes you might of never thought of, so prepare for those.  Then the wedding, what a happy day.  But struggles will be all around and in order to keep the marriage alive you have to work on it.  When your marriage is having troubles, work on it, don't let divorce be an choice, unless very needed.  This is a sacred blessing and needs to be cared with more respect.
~m

And I'm doin' just fine.

On Monday I was thinking a lot about my family and the roles we each play.  There is me and then my two older sisters and then a younger brother and a mom and a dad.  So my brother was raised by his sisters really so he was around girl stuff all the time, but that never changed that he is still a boy.  My brother is a great guy who is strong in the church and even though he was around girl things he just naturally loved boy things, nothing changed for him.  As sisters we would try to toughen him up and tell him to be strong, like we were trying to play a male role for him but we are still girls and he is turning out just fine.  He is sixteen now and preparing for a mission and going to school and loves playing spots and video games and hanging out with girls as well as guys.  My parents of course played a role and to me it was always a lesson and we have always known what is expected of us.  As girls my father has taught us to respect ourselves and to be ladies, because that is who we are.  They both made education important and have helped us through it.  My dad always tells us the importance of finding a good young man who can take care of us.  My mom always tells us that she can marry who we want as long as they are worthy to take us to the temple.  As for my brother he was taught that it is important to serve a mission and prepare for it now and to be ready so that he will be able to take good care of his wife when that time comes.  So for us there was never anything big but we were taught life lessons and knew what we needed to do.  The church was always a major role and my parents supported us in everything we did which I think is a big deal because we are all still very active in the church and we are a close family.  Something I find interesting though is that we all were raised by the same parents, grew up in the same house but yet we are still so different.  When we are talking I am sometimes the one to disagree with the family and I feel I think different from them sometimes, which isn't bad.  That just makes me think back to that I am raised by my environment but I am who I am, I was created a certain way and even though I am similar to my family I am also different in many ways.  Another thing that got me is that for chores I remember doing outside chores more.  Well I did do housework but so did my brother and I was out in the garden pulling weeds and watering it and sometimes I enjoyed the outside work more.  I use to hate mowing the lawn but I do it and I am okay with it.  Which that goes also with now that I am older and go back home when I am off track or for the summer I am the one usually doing the chores.  My older sisters and moved out, which I will be doing officially soon, so it is just my brother at home.  When I come back though I notice that when my parents need something done, they will ask me to do it because I am the one who will most likely do it.  When they are at work I try to clean and get something done so that they can come home to something nice but even after I do that they ask me to do more. I am not complaining I am just showing that even though my brother might have a certain "man role"  I was the one doing things because my parents knew I would be responsible to do it.  Sometime yes it got annoying but I would do it.  I would get after my brother too, which he doesn't like and I do feel bad about because I'm not the mom, but if he got mad at my parents I would get after him because our parents love us so much and do so much for us that I get upset if people talk bad about their parents.  I really like the commandment of "thou shall not murmur against thy parents" I think it is so true.  Anyways back to my point is I would try to teach him to be nice and to also work to get stuff done so that he can be a good husband and father.  Also with gender roles my dad is the one cooking meals a lot.  My mom will sometimes but my dad is so good and taking charge to just help and get it done.  My dad does have a full time job, works in the garden and use to be bishop but he would still help around the house.  I always felt bad though so that is why I would try to do more of a part around the house.  My mom works as well and does help around the house so don't get me wrong there.  My mom didn't work when we were growing up though, she felt it very important to be there for us.  When it was just my oldest sister born my Aunt use to watch her but then one day Shantel called her mom and that was the end of that.  My mom quit her job and raised us all until about when I was in junior high then got a job.  She then quit again because my Grandma moved in with us after my Grandpa passed away and when her demenchia got really bad my mom did a full time job of taking care of her until she passed away and then got another job.  Another quick point I would like to hit along these lines is yes my brother was around more feminine things but he is in no way attracted to the same gender.  My brother is more sensitive but I believe it is because he was raised by girls so he knows girls more, but like I have said he is still a man.  Sometimes, now, I wonder if people were to get on him what he would be like but he is a great guy and from what we have learned in class about same sex gender attraction I know I need to look on people with a more gentle heart and see the good characteristics in them because I can make a difference in this and I plan to.

~m

All creatures of our God and King

In two of my classes we have been talking about the affects of same gender attraction on a family.  First off we are meant to love everyone.  People have different views and from a talk by Elder Oaks we need to have a balance of truth and tolerance.
In the Plan of Salvation it is required that marriage be between a man and a women.  Not just that though there are statistics that show that that marriage is better for a child.  People have done studies that show kids with the same gender parents and more likely to grow up that way, more likely to be forced into sexual activity and same gender couples are more likely to cheat before marrying their partner.
Children need a father; children need a mother, that is just how we are built.  What a mother gives, a father cannot and it's the same the opposite.  I always thought it would be hard for someone to push through that temptation (which I'm sure it is) but that can be a struggle similar to robbing someone or competing a murder, you just don't do it.  These types of feelings aren't in heaven though so for now it may be a struggle but you will be able to push through and make it to the end when we won't have to deal with temptations anymore.
~m

Crossing the line.

In class this week we talked about different relationships we have with our family members.  You can have a strong relationship in one and not the other.  It's interesting how things work out in a family.  Things may be tough in a family but I believe that the family we are in, we are meant to be in them.  God knew the best people who would help us here on earth so He worked His plan to be able to be with them.  I know my family is who I am suppose to be with and I am grateful for them. They help me to grow and I want to be able for others to have that.  I hope to help others in there relationships so they can be blessed.
~m

Convenient.

It's really cool how my classes are working out this semester.  I am taking a marriage and family relationship class which goes along perfectly with my family foundations class.  Then I am taking a money management class which goes along with my math class.  With having two family classes it really is amazing how both fit with each other.  It is also never changing.  What I learn in one class is said in the other and they are always connecting together and so from both I am always learning.  With my money and math class it is very helpful because one can help me learn and remember something from my other class.
With these it honestly really helps my testimony to grow.  It shows me that God and this gospel are never changing.  What was said from the beginning to now is still the same and will always be.
Being here at a religious school has really helped me to learn and grow.  I enjoy it here a lot because I feel I am always learning something new and new things are always opened to me.  It also may be that my way of thinking is changing and someone presents a new side to see things that I would never of thought of.  It is always helping me to build knowledge on top of knowledge.
I am excited for my major and know it will be a good one.  I enjoy all of my classes and have such smart teachers that I just love to go and sit and listen to them speak and take in their knowledge.
This all may be busy but I am excited to see how much I can grow.
~m

It's called Love.

It's the start of a new semester, one year down at BYU-Idaho and I am already on the next.  This semester is going to be a good one because I have finally declared my major as Marriage and Family studies.  I am really excited to do this because I know the devil is trying to fight down marriages and familes and I want to be able to fight against him.
I think loving someone and being able to have a family is one of the greatest blessings God has given us.  He loves us all and wants us all to be able to enjoy that as well.
I have a Mom and Dad with two older sister and one younger brother and we are a very close family and love each other.  We do a lot for each other and we are there to support each other always.
I am grateful for the family and love that I have that I hope to be able to teach and share this with others so that they can have that blessing as well.
~m